the    sides

You know what would have made this day perfect? A trip to the dentist. I mean after spending 3 hours on the phone with the insurance company concerning my totaled truck and going to the Department of Motor Vehicles - IN ARKANSAS, no less - I can’t think of a better way to end the friggin’ day.

I get to the DMV and there is the red number dispensor of which 15 of us have worshipped at. Behind the counter are 5 women pounding away on computers. Only two of which are calling numbers. Number 3 helps someone and finds the task so exhausting that she needs a 13 minute break between “customers.”

Which reminds me - when you go to the DMV - you aren’t a customer. A customer has leverage. If Best Buy screws up, you can complain, get a manager or go to Circuit City. A customer has choices. At the DMV - you are a victim. The Department of Motor Victims. If the lady behind the counter wants 23 Diet Cokes and bathroom break with 47 people in line - she is going to take it.

So, a lady comes out to the lobby to “help” us. If we have all of our required documents, photo ID, credit card or debit card, only need to renew, don’t need a new tag, just need the sticker - you can come to the kiosk. A new “customer friendly feature” of the DMV. (Her words, not mine.)

Do you take cash or check there?

No.

What about handicap stickers?

No.

What about changing your address?

No.

Nobody in the lobby moved. One guy looked at her and said - “so the state has hired you to help nobody, huh?”

Up walks a new guy, grabs a ticket, goes right up to the counter and the lady behind the counter is starting to help him. All of us are grumbling. I say “hey - are you going to actually use the numbers you are making us take?”

She looked right at me and said…”I’m new here.”

“They haven’t taught you to count yet?”

“Well, I’m new here.”

“Obviously. Can you count?”

The lobby is laughing hysterically, the lady is red with anger, embarrassment and I feel awful. It just came out before I could stop it. So she starts calling numbers - seems that 4 or 5 people have left. Guess whose number was next? Yep.

To be continued….