sides
Jer made a comment on this post. I love Jer - even though he’s Canadian. I’d thought I’d share our e-convo thing we’ve got going on because…
Well, it’s fun and I hope insightful.
Okay, I’m not sure about the insightful part.
For my dear Canadian friend Jer,
I’m not anti-dating at all. And I wouldn’t classify my thoughts/comments as even convictions. More like….I enjoy curly fries over regular fries kinda category.
Important - but not life threatening.
In college, I finally figured it out that dating at its best was about getting to know someone - the true self while I was being my true self. If it fit, keep going. If it didn’t - move on, no harm, no foul. But that was hard to do in high school.
First, I (and most others) was in “please the other to extent that it changed who I was” mode….not good. not healthy. So you really couldn’t get to know the true self OR be your true self.
Secondly, I was more focused on “gettin’ some” than anything else. And when the physical gets involved - it’s impossible to walk away without hurting or being hurt.
ahhhhh….So the truth comes out.
And yes, I dated my future wife because she was hot, intelligent, loved the Lord, and athletic. Plus she drove a red ‘85 IROC Camaro. (That thing was impossible to get in and out of but it could haul asphalt.)
I’m NOT going to tell you in what order of importance those WERE to me. I WILL tell you that the list has changed little (no more IROC) but their importance has.
HOT has now moved into the top spot.
3 responses so far ↓
1 Heath // Aug 29, 2005 at 5:04 pm
Well, I wasn’t so much after “some” in HS, it was more indirect than that for me. I agree with the rest though, how many times did I try new clothes or different behaviours just to impress a girl?!?! I wasted so much money and time…
The other side to that was that I learned alot about how to do (and not do) the dating thing. It’s a toss up. I think about 90% of HS dating could be avoided and money/time/heartache could be saved.
2 Wayne // Aug 29, 2005 at 9:38 pm
After reading Grant’s rants on this, I’ve come to two conclusions:
1. Grant has way too much time on his hands as a life group pastor.
2. Going from an IROC to a mini-van must really stink.
3 The Mattman // Aug 30, 2005 at 1:59 pm
An IROC? Sweet. I would have been talking to her too. My wife was driving an Eclipse when I met her. Anywho, those are great comments Grant. Dating is getting to know someone. It is so hard to keep that in mind when today’s culture (I was included) seem to push toward thinking that gettin some is a way to get to know someone. Not true by a long shot and pain and mis-trust is all that road will bring you.
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