the    sides

I find it mildly annoying that God will intersect my life with students who are wrestling with the same basic issues that I’m either walking through myself or just finished walking through on a “larger” scale.

I use that term ‘larger’ loosly because I’m not sure it’s all that much larger to God. I mean, what really is the big difference with a teen deciding what college to go to and me wrestling with what God wants me to do next? I’d like the think my issue is ‘larger’ (more important) but is it really?

So as I was listening to her do verbal gymnastics over where to go to college, I prepared to walk her through some of the insights I’ve stumbled into over the years. Somewhere in this exchanged – I realized I was no longer talking to just her.

G: “It’s really not as difficult as you’re making it.” (Her eyes roll)

G: “Seriously! Let’s just answer some simple questions, okay?” (Her arms are folded but listening.)

G: “Listen – just give me the benefit of the doubt for just a little bit and engage for a second, okay?” (Arms unfolded, slight smile appears.)

G: “Thank you. You said that you just want to do what God wants you to do, right?”

XX: Right.

G: “Do you really mean that or is that just religious lip service?”

XX: “Well, yes I mean it!!!”

G: “Relax. I’m not accusing you of anything. We just really need to be blunt honest at this point because that’s the root of the whole thing. If you don’t mean it – don’t put yourself through all the false guilt and worry. Just pick a school for the same reasons that millions of other teens pick ‘em – great parties, guy/girl ratio, scholarships, affordability, close to home, far from home, field of study, yadda yadda yadda.”

XX: “Well, I do mean it. Now what?”

G: “Then there’s just a couple of other things to wrestle with. Has God had ever given a clear direction and decision to make in the past? What was that like? Anything similiar happening now? Is one decision on the board going to clearly take you further away from Christ? If not….what does your heart want?”

She looked at me really crazy at the last one. “What does MY heart want? What does that have to do with anything?”

I think this is when I realized that I was no longer talking to her.

G: “If you’ve got these options AND it really is your heart’s desire to follow God AND there isn’t a clear right/wrong – this is what God wants, this is what God doesn’t want – then maybe….just maybe….”

She finished my sentence…”Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart.”

We smiled.

G: “Yep. Maybe, just maybe this is one of those decisions that God knows your heart and you’ve delighted yourself in Him and He is saying to you – just like any good dad does when he takes his kid to a candy store – just pick.”

I gave a little hug. “Just listen. He’ll speak. Keep delighting yourself in Him.”

She nodded and smirked. “So….how’s your search going?”

I laughed very loud. “I think I’m going to be just fine. I’m listening right now too!”