the G sides

aka - What I’ve Learned By Buying A House In Colorado…

1. Avoid buying a house that is listed with a relocation company AND a real estate agent. Of course, you won’t know this until you actually make an offer but avoid it anyway. 2 companies means 2 times the paper to sign.

2. If the sellers are going through a nasty divorce, it really isn’t that great of house or deal. Trust me on this one.

3. The nice neighborhood covenants keep people from becoming…well, rednecks. No weeds taller than 6 inches, no cars on blocks, no dogs under the porch. However, read the fine print.

4. Nice neighborhood covenants can go overboard. 4 inch thick rule book that includes this gem: Basketball goals must either be clear or match the color of the house and may not be mounted on the house. Christmas lights must be removed by the 1st of February. (I like that one.)

I have more but the update is this - we didn’t close yesterday but will close on Thursday. After some fairly intense artillery rounds back and forth, (”You know, if both the husband and wife love that house so much, they can keep it. Since you’ve failed to close just give us the earnest money and we’ll find another house.”) we have a key to the house and can take possession today.

Of course that was after I delayed the movers to Wednesday.

Oh well. We are no longer homeless.