the    sides

Do you ever get the idea that maybe you’re over-parenting? I’m amazed at my ability to hang out with youth and not have a care in the world but the moment my kids come in the room I become “Control Freak Grant.” It’s not good. It’s definitely a character flaw that needs to improve on my behalf. I woke up to this reality this morning.

“There’s something wrong with the heat.”

That’s not how anyone wants to wake up, let alone in December. I suddenly realized that I was cold. Very cold.

“The heat isn’t working.”

While I think I understood the first time she said it, I was so out of it Amy had to dress me. I’m not kidding. I’m stumbling around the bedroom and Amy is throwing clothes at me. You could hang meat in our basement. Outside there was a light dusting of snow and you could tell it was cold outside.

Eventually I stumble down to the basement and immediately I see the problem. The main power switch is off. Which means someone had to switch it off. Which would be easy because it looks just like a light switch. Which means it was one of the kids.

Amy goes to find out who turned it off but we both just started laughing because we know what happened. The metamorphosis of me becoming my dad is almost complete.

“Turn off the lights, please.”
“Please turn off the lights when you leave a room.”
“The monsters like the dark so when you leave your room, turn off the light.”
“We don’t have to have the lights on for the room to stay in the house. If it’s dark, the room will stay put.”
“We have 3 floors - do we have to light them all at the same time?”
“TURN OFF THE LIGHTS!”

So at bedtime last night, Camber came up from the basement and turned off every light. Because she’s awesome like that. She had no clue she’d turned off the heat.

In a few moments the heat was running, hot chocolate was being poured and the English family adventure had heat once again.

But as my beautiful daughter drank her hot chocolate I smiled at the notion that last night she flicked that switch because she wanted to obey - to help - to “be good.” She didn’t brag about it, she just did it and went on. It didn’t work out exactly as she planned but her heart was what mattered to me.

It’s awesome that God is like that. 80% of the time I do something, I’m quite sure it’s not the best way to do it or even remotely what the Father exactly had in mind. But His grace is scandalous enough to cover it because He sees my heart.

I’m not saying my heart is always good. I am saying that when it is - and my actions don’t measure up - the heart trumps the action.

Now if I could parent that way all the time….