sides
I guess at some point this whole Car Classification will have it’s own category on my blog.
To catch you up…here’s the saga so far.
First there was the story on My New Ride and all the comments therein.
Next, we tried to get some handles on what exactly made a car manly, chick, or metro.
Then we talked about Cowballs.
As full disclosure, these are the cars I’ve owned and how I’d classify them. I’ve left out Amy’s cars…unless they were manly.
1985 Ford Tempo, 4 cylinder, light brown, 5-speed
My first car. Automatically that garners the NE classification. Somewhere my mom has a picture of this car covered in mud. I mean, buried in mud. I was a senior in high school and there was momentary insanity on my part as I tried to follow a Jeep through the mud. It got great gas mileage but this was the ’80s and to be honest - no one was thinking about gas mileage. It did have a kickin’ stereo in it.
CLASSIFICATION: Necessary Evil.
1988 Chevy Camaro, IROC V8, red, automatic
Technically, Amy owned this car. She had it while we were dating and when we first got married. So I’m going to claim it. (I mean, seriously…what were we going to go out in - My Ford Tempo or her IROC…) You had to crawl into the front seat, it sat down that low. That thing could freakin’ fly. When you stepped on the gas, it would hunker down and growl at you. Amy got a few speeding tickets in this thing.
CLASSIFICATION: MANLY
1990 Chevy Silverado, V8, gold, 5-speed
Loved this truck. Ironically enough - one of my dads helped me buy it. A few years later, I sold it to my other dad. Keepin’ it in the family. (Dad still drives it.) Couple of cool stories with this truck. First, driving back to Texas after I got it, I blew out two tires in Clinton, Mississippi. Put it in the ditch in Kansas.
CLASSIFICATION: MANLY
1998 Toyota Tundra, V8, green, automatic
We will now observe a moment of silence.
By far my favorite vehicle of all time. It was loaded to the gills - off-road package suspension, tires, and skid plates. It did awesome in the snow, mud, dirt - whatever. Didn’t handle underwater very well. I had to go through a few months of therapy after totaling this one.
CLASSIFICATION: MANLY
2002 Toyota Sequoia, silver
The Sequoia is built on the Tundra frame to compete with the Suburban. Best driving vehicle we’ve ever owned - very smooth, comfortable. In the winter - it’s a SUV hauling skis and people to the mountains. In the other seasons - it’s a mini-van on steroids. With 3 growing kids, we’ve got a vehicle that we can all of us plus grandparents around. Manly Accessories: Step bar, full size spare, trailer hitch, ski racks, Denver Bronco magnet.
CLASSIFICATION: NE/MANLY
2004 Hyundai Sonata, V6, white
The one that was totaled. We bought it for the gas mileage. Plain and simple.
CLASSIFICATION: NE
2002 Nissan Xterra, V6, 4WD, solar yellow
Manly Accessories: step bar, 4wd, skid plates, ski rack, roof rack bin, full size spare (noticeable), off-road tires.
Metro Qualities: color, no trailer hitch (this will be fixed shortly.)
CLASSIFICATION: MANLY
11 responses so far ↓
1 wayne // May 9, 2008 at 8:43 am
Still in denial about the xterra being a chic-mobile. The first step to recovery is admitting you have a problem, Grant.
2 ann // May 9, 2008 at 9:08 am
so we’re classifying the sonata as a NE, but we’ve chosen to heckle my husband about buying a yaris for the same reason??? comeon, its at least a manly color and transmission. it should at least garner a NE.
3 wayne // May 9, 2008 at 5:43 pm
My first car was a NE as well. Coming from a poor professor and a mail carrier, my first car was a 1978 Ford Fiesta — look it up online, it was a real car. I got it after it had 110,000 miles on it from my mom’s mail route and had been through two clutches, multiple sets of brakes, and who knows what else. To top it off, it was sunkist ORANGE. Try being a cool 16yo in a car like that! I had to work on that thing just about every weekend.
4 kurt // May 9, 2008 at 8:27 pm
The line-up:
-73 Opel GT: Baby corvette with no power
-80 Toyota PU: Hauled manly dirt bikes
-83 Chevy Blazer: First 4 wheeler
-87 Hyundai: Wimpmobile
-89 Ford Tempo: Blahmobile
-93 Aerostar: Parentmobile
-98 Sentra: All about the MPG
-88 Pathfinder: The Baja Bomber
-03 Escape: Nicest car I ever owned
-03 Tracker: Great on gas and snow so I can’t complain
5 jill // May 9, 2008 at 9:23 pm
i’m sorry…i have to agree about the denial thing. but i would categorize the xterra as more metro…even with all the other accessories…
and can i mention this is a rather intense blogging saga…about a car???
6 wayne // May 10, 2008 at 3:42 pm
See, Jill, I was trying to be nice to Grant (for once) and not go as far as to call it metro — but I agree with you…actually I was going to ask if it came with a rainbow sticker on the back.
7 robert // May 11, 2008 at 10:50 am
the xterra is at the very least metro, but probably a chic-mobile.
of course, i drive a 626 which is pretty much amorphous genderwise.
8 Mimi // May 11, 2008 at 12:09 pm
Whoops! Did you let the cat out of the bag? I don’t remember Amy’s tickets (probably happened while you were driving). Or maybe the memory is fading!!
9 Grant // May 11, 2008 at 11:42 pm
And so we dance around the stump one more time…
metro?
Manly?
Chick?
One thing that is for certain - when I get the trailer hitch, there will be no cowballs on said hitch.
Amy’s tickets were all hers. She gets tickets. I total cars. That’s kinda how our relationship works.
10 MikeS // May 12, 2008 at 7:30 am
My list is too long, but I’ve either had a truck (Toyota, Ford, or Chevy), an SUV (Trooper, Pathfinder), or a Jeep (’71 CJ5). I loved everyone of them for different reasons - pure speed, power, or fun!
Here’s where I am with the whole Grant and his stinkin’ yellow Xterra - Grant, who cares!?
Can you grab some gear and head the mountains?
Can you throw some kids in the back and hang out?
Can you throw YOUR kids in the back and hang out?
OK, so it’s yellow? I’m not sure about the color, but if you like, drive it, buddy!
Have fun with it! And if you feeling a little metro-sexual just let me know and I will definitely over-nite you a pair of cowballs for it. No doubt I can find a pair here in Lower Alabama.
Enjoy it, my friend!
11 jlo // May 12, 2008 at 9:03 pm
You forgot to add automatic ignition to the Tundra.
Leave a Comment