One of the joys of living in Topeka is that it’s small enough that I regularly see people I know and it’s cool to give them a little honk and a wave. It’s fun….if you guess right.
I see a friend, do the honk thing and wave and she doesn’t see me. Okay, she’s looking over but she doesn’t really recognize me. I’ll call her.
GE: “Hey, look behind you!!”
Her: “Uhhhhh, okay.”
GE: (Noticing that the woman in front of me A) has not picked up her cell phone and B) is not looking behind her.)
Her: Grant?
GE: “You wouldn’t happen to be at 10th and Fairlawn would you? Perchance? Please?”
Her: Nope.
GE: Allllllrighty then. I’m now turning at Fairlawn.
I don’t remember much else of the conversation and hoping I didn’t scare the other lady to bits. But’s this one is still the all time classic. Be sure to scroll down and read Chris “Coach” Lane’s comment.
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I still believe you should become a writer.
How about trying to pick up the wrong child after school? When our oldest was in second grade, I went to her school to pick her up like always.
I walked into the front of the school and they had divided themselves into two groups; boys on one side, girls on the other. Where the girls were was a sea of pink. Pink jackets, pink backpacks, pink hair stuff, everything pink. I walked up to my daughter and said “Hey, sweet stuff. Let’s go.” The little girl looked at me with total fear on her face. That’s when I realized she wasn’t my daughter.
As I stood there trying to figure out how to back away from her and not scare her any more, my daughter (who had no clue about what I had just done) came running up and hugged me, and said “Hi, Mommy. Look what we did today.”
One of the teachers, who had overhead the whole thing came up and saw the confusion on my face and the fear on the other little girl’s face, mentioned that the two girls did look a lot alike. Which they did. From the back, when they were both wearing pink.
I mumbled something about how they really did, and got out of there (with the right child) as quickly as possible. I bought my daughter a purple jacket on the way home.