I see dads doing it and I’ve done it in the past – being the Coach. I think it’s cool and good for dads to coach their kids but I learned something about me when I coached. I’m one competitive beast. I want to win. I coached to win. I want our team to win.
My favorite saying – “Take a beating, give a beating.” Let you read the backstory here. Cowboy’s upset at the Vikings for the last touchdown? Cowboy up. You didn’t take the foot off the gas for Philly – and you shouldn’t have. Take your medicine like men.
What is bizarre is that Cooper and Camber have gotten this competitiveness… Cayden…not so much. Watching Cayden play is like watching a Disney movie. She’s running around, skipping, playing, smiling…generally having a good time. Deer and bluebirds sit on the sideline cheering everyone on.
“Who won?”
“Dad, that’s not why you play.”
“Really? Why then do you play?”
“Because it’s supposed to be fun.”
“Winning is fun.”
“Dad – it’s not whether you win or lose – ”
“You see, Cayden, that’s where you are wrong. It does matter – ”
Amy from the kitchen – “GRANT!!!!!”
“Ok, Cayden…we’ll finish this conversation later out of earshot of your mother.”
Which is funny because Amy is one competitive beast as well. Maybe more so than I am but I’ll let her tell her side of the story on her blog. Oh wait…she doesn’t have one. Oh well, you’ll have to take my word for it. If you played one of Amy’s teams back in the day, their goal was to hit the floor at 400 mph and not stop…ever.
And Coop and Cammy are more in that vein. I like this. I really like this. Not everybody agrees…and that’s fine but I think this competitiveness translates well into spiritual matters. That’s why I like it. In sports, if you want something you have to go get it. Work for it. Practice. Invest in it. Seek it. Pursue it. It doesn’t just happen. And the pursuit can be fun or it can be work – depending on your attitude and focus. Athletes themselves know there is value in the journey as well as the destination. But the destination absolutely has value and drives the journey.
Are you catching all the spiritual tie ins? I’m mentoring a couple of guys right now and this insight has finally clicked for them – if I want to be close to God, have intimacy with Jesus Christ – I have to want it, pursue it, invest it, practice it. It doesn’t just happen. Showing up on Sunday isn’t enough. The pursuit can be fun or work, depending on my attitude and focus. There’s value in the process of pursuit but the destination – closeness to Jesus, spiritual transformation – has the ultimate value and drives the journey.
So yeah, I’m coaching my kids….just not on the court.
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2 Comments
I like the spiritual tie in, and that is very true. Hadn’t thought about it that way.
From the first half of the post though, I’d like to say that I think the move away from keeping score in youth sports is a bad thing. It teaches the “everybody wins” mentality; that no matter how hard you try, at the end of the game everyone gets a juice box and at the end of the season everyone gets a trophy.
It sets up for a hard crash into the reality of adult life where you don’t always get that promotion, and the Christmas bonus isn’t happening this year.
Just my $0.02 from the sidelines.
I love the way you explain the 3 C’s. It is very visual and so true. Cayden is so content skipping around in her tutu , smiling and being so loving. Don’t ever let her know Bambi was killed!