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Just Another Reason Why We Love Our Life Group
May 15, 2012 – 7:20 am
Sunday night, the guys in the group attempted to pull off dinner for the wives/moms in our life group. We had lasagna, garlic bread, salads, and all kinds of dessert – chocolate, strawberries, cheesecake. We did have to call in the ladies for help on a couple of things but all in all – very nice effort by the fellas.
We had two couples in our group do the baby dedication in the services that morning at church. It was nice – very cool slide show and I never want to underestimate the significance of those moments. But at life group, I wanted to do something a bit different.
We went around the room and each of us gave the parents a nugget that we thought would be helpful on their journey in raising their kids under the authority of Jesus. Here is what was said:
Enjoy the time with them. It will go by very fast.
Create an environment in your home where they love being home and what to bring their friends over. Be that house for your kids.
Say “no” to your kids. And mean it. And when they get in trouble, let them feel the consequences while they are still small. It just gets harder the older they get.
What your kids want most from you is you. Not your insight or knowledge or even stuff. Just you. So say yes to that as much as you can even when you are tired, cranky, and lazy.
Pray for your kids, pray over your kids, and pray WITH your kids.
Listen to your kids. You will learn great spiritual truths from them, more than any sermon from Grant.
Don’t ever be afraid to apologize to your kids when you’ve messed up. It won’t undermine your authority, they won’t take advantage of it. They forgive quickly, it shows them true humility, they’ll grow up respecting you more for it.
What would you add?
How To Teach Your Kids About Grease Fires
May 8, 2012 – 8:42 am
Cinco de Mayo is normally an official holiday for the English family. We love it. This past weekend, it sort of snuck up on us but it was a fun day.
The plan was to fry some fish, make some homemade salsa and guacamole. I normally fry fish in corn meal and a “not-so-secret” mix of spices that include Creole seasoning, salt and pepper. My grandmother fried fish this way. It’s awesome. Even people that don’t like fish, like my fish.
And I wanted to try something different. Mistake 1.
We found a batter that was flour based. I put the grease on the grill, getting it hot and ready to fry.
Normally, I stand there and watch it. Yes, it’s slow and boring but it’s safe. My dad’s a fireman, some things just sort of stay with you.
Whatever made me run inside and try to finish up the batter for the fish, I don’t really know. I do know that it was taking forever. Batter was working, was too thick, wasn’t sticking — just not working – when Coop says – “Man – the grill is really going good.”
There is nothing but smoke coming out of the grill. I know what’s happened. The grease in the iron skillet on the grill is so hot that it is burning, more than likely when I open the lid there is going to be a fire ball….on my brand new back porch.
I run outside and kill the gas burner. (Good.)
I can feel the heat from the grill and see the flames. (Not good.)
Amy grabs a bowl to smother the fire. (Good.)
I open lid of grill to put lid on skillet. (Not good.)
Fire shoots up into the sky. (Cool looking, but overall – not good.)
I get the bowl over the skillet and smoke goes everywhere. (Good.)
I tell my son that no matter what happens, he is NOT to put water on a grease fire OR call Topeka Fire Department. I would never hear the end of this if the Chaplain had to call the FD to put out a fire.
Meanwhile, new batter recipe has hardened a bit. (Not good.)
We move iron skillet off to the side so that we can get Fry Daddy out to continue making dinner. In process of moving iron skillet, bowl is knocked off pan and grease is still so hot, it catches on fire again. (Not good.)
Amy comes out with a big iron lid. That snuffs out fire. (Good.)
We finally get to frying fish. (Good.)
Batter will not fry right for some reason. Fish is dried out, crispy mess if we fry batter right. Batter is dripping goo if we keep fish moist and white like it’s supposed to be. (Not good.)
We dump new batter recipe, go back to old way. (Good.)
Cooking fish has now taken us 3 times as long as normal. (Not good).
Good news — the fish was awesome…finally. And I’m not changing my fish recipe ever again.
Help Get Me and Cooper Out Of The Country
April 26, 2012 – 6:26 am
With all the craziness this year, our summer mission trip to Brazil has kinda completely sneaked up on me. Cooper smoked me this year getting his support letter out.
Cooper hit all the basics in his. I’ll add a couple of details.
First, we will again be taking a group of teenagers to Porto Alegra, Brazil to partner with Thomas and Agnes Schneider and the Word of Life crew. Last year was the first time we tried this kind of a trip and in July. It’s cold, wet and none of us – Brazilians or Americans – had a clue if this would even work. The idea was to promote a spiritual getaway weekend with Americans. We had local churches come as well as a winter retreat.
Word of Life would not only bring in students but youth workers, pastors, and church leaders for the weekend to get some spiritual training and refreshment. I’d also have the opportunity to do some discipleship training with the missionary staff. It was a lot to do in a short amount of time. We had no idea it could even work.
It was a huge success. Again, because we are Americans and speak English (most of us), we are a huge commodity for them. We gain Word of Life access to schools they would have no chance of getting into, allowing them to reach even more kids with the story of Jesus. We saw many kids come to Christ. You can read about last year’s trip here.
Second, after this year, this will become an every-other year mission trip. It’s an expensive trip but we’ve been able to partner with another US church who will go in our off years. So they will go in 2013, we will go in 2014.
Third, like last year while the kids are playing soccer and hanging out with other teens, I’ll be working. Seriously, I’ll be teaching some discipleship courses to college-age kids as well as giving some theological training to some national youth pastors who would never be able to afford seminary or college classes.
It’s a huge honor for me. I think I end up learning more than they do but their eagerness to learn, their hunger for the Word of God, their desire to be closer to Christ is just infectious. I wish you all could go with us just once to experience it.
How can you help?
First, you can follow me on twitter (@thegsides) and follow me on this blog. It will keep you updated on the trip and you’ll have a better idea exactly how to pray for us. Plus, I’ll post pics when I can and tell you all kinds of funny stories along the way.
In a country where Spiritism is the leading religion, it is NOT cliche’ for me at all. I will need a huge amount of prayer support. We all will. Every year this trip is awesome, every year I see or experience something that reminds me how real spiritual warfare is.
Obviously, you can support us by sending us money for the trip. The trip is $2,000 and anything you give is tax-deductible. You can donate online by going here. There are instructions to guide you through it. That is a secure server so it’s a safe place.
You can also mail me a check. Make it out to Western Hills Baptist Church. NO WHERE ON THE CHECK CAN IT HAVE MY NAME ON IT! You can put “Brazil” in memo. You can either direct message on Twitter, leave a comment, or fill out my contact page for my address. I try not to post it online.
This year, Cooper is going with me. 14 years went by very, very fast. I’d never thought back then that one day I’d be going on a mission trip with my son going as a worker as well. I can’t put into words what that is like – serving alongside your kid and watching them grow a heart for Jesus and other people. All of my kids are so much further down the road than I was at their age. I’m a proud dad.
If you have any questions or would like to know more about our trip – just leave a comment or DM me on twitter. I love talking about Brazil!
Thanks for your support.
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- Fun way to end trip.
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- Coop on a log
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- Coop on a wire
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- Taylor, Jessa, Cullen, Cooper, Laura
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- They are everywhere….somewhere our students are in there.
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- Thomas and I look in awe at how students swarm us.
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- This is ridiculous good. Shouldn’t be legal.
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- You can’t even begin to know how good this is.
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- We got dad duty.
Cooper’s Brazil Mission Trip Letter
April 25, 2012 – 7:35 pm
The following is the letter Cooper wrote and sent out to get support for the upcoming Brazil Mission trip. I’m going with him (yes, you can support me as well. My plug and plea for money is comin later on this blog on on twitter).
I’m just kinda…no, I’m a whole lot of proud of Cooper. All of our kids really. They are developing a hear for missions, for serving others. They are so much further down the road spiritually than I was at their age and it’s one of the best things in my life to be able to do ministry WITH them.
Here’s Cooper’s letter.
Dear friend,
I get to go to Porto Alegre Brazil again! We are going to work at a camp for Brazilian kids where they can have fun and learn about God and having a faith in a place where its not so easy. Camps take place on the weekend. When we are not at camps, during the week, we are speaking at schools. We talk about our daily lives here in the states and then at the end we share the gospel! It is a blast!
In Brazil, being an American is like having an all-access pass to anywhere. We are invited to speak at all kinds of schools. Public, Private, Secular, Religious, you name it. They love it if we talk about life in the states. Thomas acts as our translator. We talk and then, after we have shared the gospel, we either go to another classroom or we play sports and talk to the kids. This will be the second time I get to go to brazil.
One of the things I am especially excited to do is to play soccer with the other kids. The kids there are so good at soccer, a pick-up team of them could probably beat a school team here. Soccer in Brazil is basically a religion.
I am also excited to go and see all of the missionaries! When I got there last time, I knew that I had never seen any of these people before in my life, but it felt like I was their family. They just welcomed us in.
Another reason I am excited this year is because I can’t wait to tell the story of Christ to a bunch of kids. The two weeks is kind of like cinderella. Famous in the day, doing dishes and cleaning toilets at night.
You can support me in three ways.
The most important way is prayer. This trip is so amazing and God has to prepare me for the challenges and experiences I will go through. The power of prayer is never to be underestimated.
Second, follow me, stay up to date (as best as I can) and even encourage me via twitter. My name is @buckshot643.
The third option is financial. The entire trip costs $2,000. Anything you give is tax-deductible. You can donate online at http://www.whillschurch.org/2012/03/2012-brazil-mission-trip. It’s a secure server login from there.
Or you can write a check to Western Hills Baptist Church, put Brazil in the memo and mail it to me. [If you are interested in supporting him or me - contact me, leave a comment. I'll send you our address.] NO WHERE ON THE CHECK CAN IT HAVE MY NAME ON IT!
This is going to be a life-changing trip and I thank you for you time and prayers.
Sincerely,
Cooper
Coop on a wire
Coop on a log
Fun way to end trip.
How I Handled My Son Being A Thespian
April 23, 2012 – 11:26 am
Cooper’s debut into the world of theater was last night and I must say – I was impressed. Not just with him, the whole cast. You could tell that this particular bunch of kids were all in.
You never know what you are going to get with middle school drama…that applies to more than just the theater. But this was a pretty significant risk for an 8th grade boy – going out for the school play.
I remember when the roles were posted and he got the lead, I was just as excited about it as he was. Then reality hit him – “I have to learn 187 lines of dialogue.”
“Yeah……yeah, you do.”
He absolutely nailed it on both nights. The whole cast was outstanding in fact.
(Although I do have to say that Friday night’s performance was better than Saturday’s…just saying.)
It was a fun weekend and I do think Cooper will do this again. He was good. I’m not just saying that as a “dad.” I did some theater in high school, I know how hard it can be. And he did great considering he’s in 8th grade and it was his first time ever on stage.
Okay, I am a little biased but I’m not apologizing about that either!!
Plumbing Consecration
February 2, 2012 – 11:54 am
This originally appeared as a weekly devo for whillschurch.org
As Mari was teaching this past weekend about the Ark and the people of Israel consecrating themselves for the journey ahead (Joshua 3), I started thinking about my tub. I had to fix mine this past weekend and it’s been rumored that the average home repair takes 3 trips to the local hardware store. Personally, I’d love it if it only took me 3 visits. Fortunately for me, I didn’t need any trips to the store for this fix. We had a slow drain.
The big decision I had to make was this – should I lug my whole, heavy toolbox upstairs or just grab the tools that I need? Obviously, I don’t want to be carry all that weight and all those tools upstairs. Besides that, I’ve done this job before so I know what I’m doing.
Trip Downstairs #1: I grabbed my channel-lock pliers, a screwdriver, and a wire coat hanger. Why the coat hanger? Ask someone who has daughters or a wife with long hair. They can tell you the gross details.
I get back upstairs to the tub, grip the top of the drain with the channel-locks and quickly realize that I cannot hold on to the bottom part of the drain. It’s too slippery. I need another set of channel-locks.
Trip Downstairs #2: Get second set of channel-locks.
Back upstairs to the tub, grip the bottom of drain. Top turns right off with little problem. Grab screwdriver to completely remove drain when I notice I have a Phillips head and I need a flathead.
Trip Downstairs #3: Grab flathead screwdriver.
Back upstairs to the tub, put screwdriver into tub drain and now see that this particular flathead is too narrow. I need a wider flathead.
Trip Downstairs #4: Grab fatter flathead screwdriver.
Back upstairs to the tub, fatter flathead works like a charm. Drain comes right off. Grab wire hanger to clean out drain. Realize I don’t have my plastic trash bag to put treasure that I am digging up.
Trip Downstairs #5: Grab plastic trash bag. Grab rubber gloves. Pat myself on back for avoiding Trip Downstairs #6.
Back upstairs to the tub, clean out drain with no problem. Put…stuff in bag and then tie bag up.
Put drain drain back together and realize that during Trip Downstairs #5, I took the fat flathead out of my pocket to answer the phone. Fat Flathead is now sitting on downstairs kitchen counter.
Trip Downstairs #6: Grab fatter flathead.
Back upstairs to the tub, put the drain back in with no problem. Grab bag to throw. Bask in the glory of a job done.
Trip Downstairs #7: Grab an ice tea and some peanuts. Amy asks – did you test to see if that solved the problem?
Back upstairs to the tub. Turn on water. Drains like a…well…not really sure what simile to use here. It works great.
Trip Downstairs #8: Tell Amy yes. Realize I left my drink on the bathroom counter upstairs.
Sell the house for a single floor, ranch style home.
I am curious how many of us approach our faith like this? We show up to a task bringing the bare minimum of what we think is required for the job. After all, we’ve done this before. We know what we are doing. We just want to get this done so that we can go on with the rest of our day/week/life.
Instead, our lack of CONSECRATION to the task at hand turns a simple job into a lot of work, a lot of frustration, and at times makes the accomplishment of the task impossible.
I loved Mari’s definition of Consecration she taught us this week – to make ready, to get prepared. When God told the Israelites to Go!, He first told them to GET READY – to consecrate themselves. Do what you know to do, what you need to do to be in a place to obey, to get the job done.
Next time you hear a GO! from the Lord, consecrate yourself. Bring the whole tool box.
20 Years and some Disney Magic
December 23, 2011 – 5:10 pm
This year was our 20-year anniversary. Now this is a significant date for me for a couple of reasons. First, I’m one of the only family members (that married) that hasn’t been divorced. Second, we spent the first 17 years of our marriage in student ministry. That means that while everyone else was on vacation or break, we weren’t. Summers and Winters are prime camp and retreat times.
Our first 17 anniversaries were spent with students at conferences or camps. To Amy’s credit – she never complained about that. So I absolutely wanted this 20-year marker be something very special. Since we honeymooned at Disney World, what better place to celebrate the anniversary?
We stayed at the Port Orleans: French Quarter Resort on the Disney property. I also got us reservations for dinner at the California Grill on top of the Contemporary Hotel – so I thought. You can see Magic Kingdom from there and the plan was to eat dessert, see the fireworks, have the romantic music playing…you get the picture.
As I’m getting ready to leave for Florida, I realize that I never got a confirmation email from Disney about the dinner reservation. I call and it’s not there. They don’t have any record of it at all. We’ve got the room at Port Orleans, just no dinner at the California Grill.
The lady was very nice – gave me a couple of other locations to see the fireworks – but I was pretty upset at myself.
We get off the plane in Orlando and I have a voicemail. It’s Guest Services at Disney. The lady that was helping me was calling me back but we missed each other. Her voicemail said she’d be out of the office until next week sometime.
Next day we get to Port Orleans and it is gorgeous. We got a touch of Mickey in the room and it felt like we were in New Orleans. The streets, the look and the beignets! Oh yeah.
I finally get dinner reservations at another restaurant. It wasn’t California Grill but it was still nice and we could head over to the Polynesian for the fireworks afterward. That’s when the craziness started. I get a phone call from Jennifer at the California Grill. She saw it was our anniversary and while she didn’t have a 9pm spot, she had an 8pm, would I be interested. I said – yes but it’s already 5ish now and we’ve got reservations that I’m not sure I can get out of this late. I really appreciate the effort and the thought. So I hang up.
My phone rings 10 minutes later. It’s Jennifer from the California Grill again. “Mr. English, this is your 20 year anniversary, right? I mean, you really need to have this dinner at the California Grill. So I’ve taken care of those other reservations for you. We are covering the fee for them. See you at 8, okay?”
Needless to say, I was floored. What kind of incredible service is that?
So what do you do to kill time at Disney before 8pm dinner reservations? You check out the other hotels on the monorail. Here are some pics…
We check in on the 2nd floor of the Contemporary Hotel for the California Grill. At check in, we’re told that they are running about 15 to 20 minutes behind on their reservations but to go on upstairs and enjoy the view and the lounge. We are escorted on the express elevator to the 15th floor. At the main reception desk upstairs, I notice the manager, his name is Gary. I asked him about Jennifer, she got off earlier in the night but I made sure he knew about what she did for us. He smiled and said — oh, that’s not all she arranged for you.
Instead of being 15 minutes behind, right at 8pm we were taken to our table. Not just any table but a small table for two located in a cozy corner with an incredible view of Cinderella’s Castle and all of Magic Kingdom. Our table was sprinkled with Mickey Confetti as well.
Bill would be our waiter for the evening. By the way – every staff that we ran into wished us a Happy Anniversary. Very nice touch. The view and the service were outstanding, the food was even better. Bill walked us through the menu. We did a Sushi starter platter. I ordered the Beef Filet, Amy took on the Pork Tenderloin.
I wouldn’t order the sushi platter again. The shrimp, tuna, and salmon were outstanding. So was the white nut shrimp roll. There was another fish on it that was good but the other rolls and mackerel were not to our liking. But it sure did look pretty.
The entrees were the best. The steak was probably the best I’ve ever eaten. All of the food was incredible.
We were really taking our time with the meal. We thought if we were slow enough, we could be finishing up dessert right as the fireworks started. The waiter had already cleared a couple of other tables in his section. We really shouldn’t have worried about it.
As he cleared our plates, he said ‘Alright guys, want you to take a little break. I’ll be back here in about 10 minutes with dessert menus that way you guys will be eating dessert while watching the fireworks! And only order one dessert. I’ve got something special for you.”
Here’s what he ended up bringing us along with free glasses of champagne to celebrate our anniversary. That is peppermint ice cream with a chocolate cake with a hot fudge cream middle. Bill also brought us a piece of chocolate mousse cake. Complete with the “Happy Anniversary” chocolate placards.
And the fireworks were incredible with the soundtrack from Magic Kingdom being piped into the restaurant. Overall, the BEST anniversary ever. What a great experience and I’m blown away by how the Disney staff just took care of us and once again used a little magic to make it happen!
Here are some more pics!
Cold, Ran, Broke, Fixed, Not Quite Fixed
November 15, 2011 – 11:10 am
It was 27 degrees today and windy.
Got on elliptical to work out. Amy headed outside to walk. It had climbed to a balmy 36 by the time she was outside.
I get about 10 minutes into my workout and Amy calls -”It’s not that bad. You can do this.”
She was probably right…but I was already in the zone and didn’t really want to stop, gear up and catch up.
10 minutes later, the elliptical goes into this wobbly mass of chaos. I try to push through it but it’s just getting worse. This machine was a hand-me-down and my dad has fixed multiple times. If it was a horse, we’d already would have put it down.
I climb off, grab some tools and start taking it apart with hopes of fixing it. After 25 minutes, it’s fixed. I test it out, it’s still a little loose. Not perfect but by now I’ve run out of time.
Probably will brave the cold in the AM. I just don’t like the wind. It feels like a million needles going straight through me. BUT…I’ve dropped over 30 pounds this summer and fall and I’ve got to keep it off. MAINTAIN until the spring then another big push.
Fishing With Dad
October 7, 2011 – 11:43 am
Dad and Mary came into town and so I took Dad fishing. He wasn’t all that thrilled about it at first. But….after we caught 30 fish (all released back so we can catch them again someday), he was a happy a camper.
Here are some pics….
Is Divorce Ever Okay? Part 1
September 22, 2011 – 7:59 am
This originally appeared on www.whillschurch.org as a weekly devo.
This is part 1 of a 2-part devo.
Our Art of Marriage series has been absolutely incredible. We are hearing some incredible stories as a result of it but any series on marriage is going to bring up one question:
Is divorce ever okay?
Very rarely is this question asked for theory’s sake. There is normally a very personal, very painful reason for the question. There is no easy button with this question but any answer must start with Jesus’ dialog with the Pharisees in Matthew 19:1-12 on the same exact subject.
It’s not very encouraging to realize that religious leaders have wrestled with this question for centuries. In Jesus’ day, there were two common position that the Jews held concerning divorce. The first one believed it was lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any offense – disagreement, disrespect, disobedience, burnt the toast. The other position believe that only for the reason of sexual immorality was it allowed. The Pharisees came to Jesus to get his position on the matter.
If you are asking about divorce, you’ve missed the point of marriage.
Jesus takes them back to Genesis 2:24. God’s intention from the beginning was that a man leave his mother and father, be united to his wife, and the two become one flesh. Forever. What God has put together, let no man tear apart. Ideally – even in the instance of sexual immorality – marriage is one man + one woman for life. The story of Hosea makes this crystal clear. God designed marriage to reflect His character and His character is to seek and love us even while we were still sinners.
The Concession of Divorce
This was obviously NOT the answer any of them expected. Even the disciples were a bit shocked by the answer (we’ll get to them in a minute). The Pharisees counter with the story of Moses issuing divorce certificates in Deuteronomy 24. The Pharisees claim that this story shows that God allows divorce and the real issue is figuring out the parameters of what is a ‘lawful’.
Jesus corrects their memory. He reminds them that divorce was already happening and the certificates were issued as a concession to protect the woman from the hard-hearts of the man. Women were being abandoned with no legitimate way to provide or protect themselves. With no proof of divorce, remarriage was dangerous and could get her accused of adultery and killed. The certificate of divorce allowed the women to remarry without fear of punishment from the ex-husband. Concessions like this in Jewish law were common and they sought to protect victims from further abuse or harm, to mitigate the damage of a sin. Laws concerning the treatment of slaves or accidental deaths are other examples of this.
The concession on issuing the certificate of divorce didn’t justify divorce as option anymore than the slavery laws justified slavery. It was allowed and provided for the protection of the woman.
Then Jesus dropped these words – “I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another woman commits adultery.”
There are two ways to understand Jesus’ words here. The most common understanding is that the only legitimate reason for divorce is adultery. While I think this is acceptable, I’m not convinced this is exactly what Jesus meant nor am I convinced this is how those around Jesus understood it.
I think Jesus was reframing the morality of marriage – much like he did in the Sermon on the Mount. I think Jesus was saying – remove the clause – if anyone divorces and remarries, he has also committed adultery. The clause just says the obvious – a marriage that has experienced adultery is already shattered and already experienced adultery.
I think everyone left there, including the disciples, just completely dumbfounded at what they had heard. Neither side was “right” in their understanding of marriage or divorce. Marriage was lifted to a whole other stratosphere with this teaching.
There is even a hint of despair in the disciples response to Jesus’ words:
“If this is the situation between a husband and wife, it is better not to marry.”
Jesus response of “Not everyone can accept these words but those who have ears to hear, let them hear” seems to support this same understanding – DIVORCE is never on God’s agenda.
So does this mean there are NO concessions today? If a woman or man is in an abusive, or adulterous relationship they are just stuck there forever?
Next week, we will look at some more scriptures to round out our answer to this question.
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