Most of us have a mask that we wear. The mask, we think, keeps us safe. It keeps us from being vulnerable so we don’t get hurt. But by the same token it keeps us from being vulnerable so we don’t get healed either. Confession requires risk. The ultimate question that we most fear the answer to is this: Will you love me if I show you who I really am?
This is what confession is:
An appropriate disclosure of my failures, temptations, struggles, victories, and thoughts for the purpose of healing or celebration.
This is what it isn’t:
a laundry list of sins that you have no intention of doing anything about.
Confession is not your brag list of disobedience or “failures” that you really don’t think are failures. It isn’t veiled gossip time – where we confess what we did wrong but the real reason we did it was “because Stanley did this first.”
Confession is about being real – being vulnerable about the real issues.
I think it’s key to unpack a crucial word here – purpose.
We want our Life Groups to be the places where we can take off our masks. I don’t think there is a subject that is off-limits in our life groups. I really don’t.
Sex? Politics? Religion? Parents? Drugs? Skipping School – pros and cons? I can’t think of a topic that should be off limits in a Life Group – with this little disclaimer on it.
What is the point? Why are you talking about it? Why are you sharing this?
If I am “sharing” because I want the attention but I am not really open to what someone else in the group might have to say about it – it’s not confession. If I am “sharing” because I want to trash someone else – we call that gossip. Am I “confessing” something that I own? Am I doing it to celebrate a win – which is a good thing. Am I doing it because I need healing and help? That is a good thing too.
Next Session: Appropriate Confession