Conflict resolution: The act of back and forth communication
Conflict isn’t necessarily bad. Can be constructive. Conflict helps us push justice, makes us better, more creative and innovative.
Greatest obstacle to conflict negotiation:
It’s not the difficult person, it’s ourselves. It’s a human tendency to react – without thinking.
When angry, you will make the best speech you will ever regret.
The REPLY and REPLY ALL button is the most dangerous button on the screen. Start using the SAVE AS DRAFT button.
Go to the balcony – get somewhere where you can get a larger perspective, a bigger vision
The biggest power in negotiations is the power to NOT react.
Skills To Be A Good Negotiator
Separate people from the problem – listen, soft on person but hard on problem, respect
Focus on Interests, not positions – why do you want/need what you want/need
Develop Multiple Options –
Objective Criteria – insist on objective standard BEFORE you get started, remove the ego, use standards that are independent of each side
BATNA – Best alternative to a negotiated agreement that satisfies your interests. What’s the alternative and is the negotiated agreement better or worse than that?
“Do I not destroy my enemy when I turn him into my friend.” – Abraham Lincoln
Great interview – going to the balcony was a very helpful metaphor. So was the reminder that the biggest power is the power to NOT react.